11 May 2017
I made it ten days completely unmedicated. There was no weaning down because my pills are only one mg. There's nothing to wean down from. Without my meds, as I already knew, my lizard brain takes over. Whatever looks best in the moment is what I do. There were a lot of naps and a whole lot of not focusing on one task for any amount of time. Lots of anxiety too, which was new. So, after ten days, I got back on my medication and things are going much better now. When I told my OB/GYN about my little experiment, she was supportive of both my experimenting and my going back on meds. "If you need them, you need them." Her words.
I had another appointment this week and, as has been the case so far, made it out with a clean bill of health for me and my baby girl. She also didn't give up anything. No face pictures. Legs together. Shifting away from the ultrasound wand the whole time. My husband texted me with "Aw, already so modest!" upon learning of his daughter's stubbornness. I replied back. "Sweetie, if she's taking after you, she probably just thinks the camera is going to steal her soul."That's exactly the kind of thing he would come up with!
An interesting development this week has been feeling her move. I've done a lot of research and seen these first movements described with wonderful imagery. "It feels like popcorn popping." "It feels like a butterfly flapping its wings." Well, I'm not sure what these mothers are feeling, but that's not my daughter at all. When she kicks me, it feels like she's kicking me. It feels exactly what being kicked from inside feels like. It's uncomfortable. Sometimes it just plain hurts.
The pregnancy is going well. I'm looking forward to future developments and am so excited to meet my daughter. Even if she kicks the hell out of my insides between now and then.
06 May 2017
I am not actually writing this blog. Instead, I am on my new cell phone, a Samsung Note 5 I believe and I am writing this blog using the speech to text feature.
At the moment, I am walking along in our lovely Texas weather and on my way to work for the day. I work a 6 hour shift today and then this evening Joshua is going to pick me up and we're going to go game. We've been gaming on and off for about the past three years or so I think with another couple. Most of our games have been in Dungeons & Dragons but we've recently switched over to the GURPS system. Our current campaign is a group of paladins which are warriors who get their powers from whatever deity they choose to pray to. It's been a lot of fun partially because this is the first time in three years of gaming together that my husband and I have been at the table both as players. In the past, one or the other of us (usually him) has been acting as the dungeon master who runs the game for the players. So this is been a very fun switch in our normal routine.
There isn't a whole lot else going on. I'm proud to say that I finally got my chores into a routine that I can keep up with. The house is finally clean to a level that I'm able to maintain it with only mild difficulty. It may not sound like much, but for me the fact that I can maintain the cleanliness of the house for the first time since we've been together is huge. I know that my husband gets anxious when the house is too messy whereas I get anxious when it's too clean. I think we found a nice balance we can strike. And honestly it just feels good knowing that everything is where it's supposed to be and it feels even better knowing that I'm the one that got it there.
I'll see about posting some photos tomorrow.